Sex and love seem to be intertwined, like you cant have one without the other, right? Personally I am addicted to sex. In any form mastubation, orgies, exploring fetishes and the list runs on. And I'm trying to stop, but it has been a part of me so long that I cant stop and I dont know if I am the only one feeling this way.
I feel safe way. Recently I have accepted that I am a man and as a man I need sex. Sadly I married her respectfully not knowing her till day of wedding and now she’s not interested in taking family planning says she doesn’t want to spoil her body . That me insisting is showing her dis service. Yet there are no men’s contraceptives. I am so tired . I want to do the right thing but it’s getting hard I now admire other women. I am so messed up
I hear your question and concerns about your life. First,to reach out for help is already a positive step forward, so congratulations. Second, is sex and love intertwined? Yes and no. Yes, because two adults in a relationship who love each other may end up having physical intimacy depending on the nature of their relationship. But people who love each other do not always end up jumping into sex, holding each other and just doing things together is still love. I believe love is wide and deeper. Of course with a mate, it is crowned with having sex.
The concern here is what you have engaged yourself with: masturbation, orgies and various types of fetishes. All these are unhealthy acts and they were never meant to be that way. However, since you have a desire to stop, you will manage if you put your mind to it. Start with one which you rate as easier to handle and once you succeed, do not turn back to it. Work out your mind by believing that sex is fulfilling without all those other acts. You need to have a strong desire to want to stop and believe in yourself. Even if you happen to slip back once in while continue believing you can stop and that is you want. I find positive self-talk helping me when I want something so badly. I keep saying and saying and saying what I want to see and no matter the storm I keep on that affirmation.