Bonga

I am married man and am still attracted to my ex who is also married. We usually find ourselves texting each other like lots of dirty messages. We have not met since we live a bit far from each other. I know this is wrong but I can't stop. I am very sure when we meet we will have sex and that will make us feel ashamed deep inside our hearts.

Hatukuachana kwa ubaya. She happens to be older than me so we decided that since I cannot marry her, she is free to get married to someone else. So ulipata jamaa akamove on. I was glad she got someone too.

But here we are now. Texting texting texting.... I know tunakosea hapa.

I am in a relationship with this amazing guy. He treats me well really well, likes me and would definitely do anything for me. The thing is, after a few months of dating i realized i am not really attracted to him physically and personality wise. He is a bit of a pushover, would do anything to please people and it has become a big turn off. 

Also he can become needy at times, and too smothering. And trying to hold a conversation with him is seriously exhausting at times. 

At first when we started dating, I thought he was rare and different. Treated women right and was not an asshole, which is rare nowadays. But the same qualities that attracted me to him are the same that are a big turn off now.


I really don't know what to do. I feel like if I break up with him I am losing a gem while at the same time I feel like there's no deep connection and that I am not in a passionate, consuming kind of relationship.

How do I start? Since childhood, I have been made to think that I cannot make it in life due to my average academic performance. To make matters worse my younger sibling seems to be excelling in everything they do and this has really killed my morale. I no longer even want to see them let alone interact with them. I have considered suicide several times but I have never had the guts to go through with it.

The only day I look forward to are weekends since I get to meet up with friends to have a good time and forget about everything else. I have also vowed never to have children in my life. Too much negativity going on in the world.

I have not graduated o was set to graduate in 2017 but I have one stubborn unit left. Thing is I feel so dumb and ashamed right now, I feel like I will be super judged. What do I do I am so scared.

To Capital group Initiative

Website Team

 

Dear Sir/Madam

RE:  INTRODUCE NOTIFICATIONS

First of all, Thank you for this amazing website that is slowly rising in bringing people suffering from mental illness that can be solved through ‘anonymous’ conversations.

Secondly, I apologize in case you find my feedback displeasing.

I THINK THIS BONGA BLOG IS SO HELFUL AND SO I FEEL THE NEED FOR YOU GUYS TO CUSTOMIZE  IT IN A WAY ONE CAN GET A NOTIFICATION(s) FROM A ‘REPLY’ HE/SHE RESPONDED TO AND A ‘POST’ A VICTIM POSTED.  I believe this customization will ease the hassle for the victims and Professionals offering solutions in tracking their posts in order to find suggested solutions… cha muhimu mumeelewa!

Kind regards,

CapitalFm Fan

I can't stop masturbating. What's the remedy?

I am a twin. I have suffered constant comparison throughout my life and now at 22 i want to start life on my own. Outside sharing classes and rooms with my twin. I want to stay away from her so that i can grow on my own. 

I constantly feel as if my mom and sisters favor my twin over me because of her academic prowess and wittiness,  and it has given me anxiety disorders and esteem issues. I really just want to start life on my own. 

While my sister wants to stay home with mom i want a job outside home(we stay in nakuru). I want a job in nairobi and in finance and financial services, consultancy, investments and advisory. Kindly someone help me get my life back in  my hands. 

Thank you. 

I've been a strong Christian over a few yrs and kept off so many things that people do - drinking, partying and having those good times. But now I recently started doing them and I've realised I'm getting more real and living that way is actually  helping me come out of my cocoon and enjoy life and opportunities more. But sadly, I've slowly drawn away from church, my former friends and all those routines. I find them unreal. Definitely they can't stand me doing all these things so I'm torn between just walking away from my previous life completely and starting over a new or whatever other option. I don't know. And my gf is in that category of friends. Advise, I might just lose it. 

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I listened to Sauti Sol song, tujiangalie. The political situation in Kenya makes me so sad. I feel hopeless every time. I am unable to get anything going because it feels like in Kenya if you don't have political connections you can't make it. Can barely get out of bed to do anything.