Bonga

I am currently in a relationship with a guy I truly loved and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with..I moved in with him we introduced each other to our families but things started changing...I didn't get the chance to finish my university so I always looked for a job that will sustain me but he hates it when I say I want to look for a job...he criticizes my last job because I worked at a restaurant as a steward I wasn't proud of it but at least I learned so many things from that job...he said he will take care of me and he did start a business that we both ran together...but things started changing he would get angry at me accuse me of smiling at customers and so many things...I decided to leave the business and let him take care of it while I stay at home but the business started failing...he would come at home with a good mood but after a few days he would get moody...I used to suffer from depression before but I was able to handle it and control but lately its like its coming back and its getting worse by the day...I try talking to him about it but he tells me I need to stop being negative coz it will affect him too...I am not allowed to talk about our business since its a negative thing to him that's why he decided to close it...right now we don't have any source of income and bills are piling up and he still doesn't want to talk about it he says that I make things worse coz of my negativity...I try speaking to him especially when I feel stressed but he tells me that I shouldn't stress because nothing will change if I continue stressing I should just live life and I shouldn't talk about it coz it will affect him

I try to tell myself its coz he is stressed but I go through so much all by myself I get lonely..I get panic attacks...anxieties that are over the roof and I don't know what to do

I also don't know where to start...I cry every single day and he just ignores me when I cry until I stop crying...I never thought I would ever cry this much I was always that girl who never cried in front of anyone I was strong and I would face anything but not anymore

  Published  16th Sep 2021 at 8:43 am

Hey, I'm no specialist but all that you just expressed about your man indicate narcissistic behavior. I'm sure you've heard about it, if not, you can do some reading about it, who knows, it might be an eye opener

Just don't give up on yourself. Hugs 🤗 and all the best

  Published  16th Sep 2021 at 9:37 am

Get your space dear, for your peace of mind. No one will understand but you need it. Get that restaurant job,and set some foundation for yourself.

  Published  20th Sep 2021 at 8:06 am

Someone who doesn't want you to work doesn't love you. Work gives us purpose, something to wake up to every day. When it is taken away, your power is taken away. That's how he wants you, powerless, so he can fulfill his need for control. You deserve better.

  Published  20th Sep 2021 at 8:08 am

Its time to leave!this is the sign you were looking for

  Published  25th Sep 2021 at 1:36 am