I have been married four years and have no children. My marriage is happy for the most part. The sex is good but I honestyl miss masturbating. It is not the same as sex and one does not replace the other. I had this conversation with my husband and he admited that he likes to masturbate in our bed after I fall asleep. Now that we both know we enjoy it, doing it together doesn't feel the same and doing it with persmission does not feel good either. I used to enjoy it when my husband comes late and I have time to enjoy myself infront of the Tv before he arrives. Is this normal? How can we put the fun back into it?

2 replies

Thank you for being open. Masturbation is the act of pleasureing yourself and more people that are willing to admit engage in it. Masturbation has a danger of progressing to addiction without one realising. The question of whether or not to masturbate depends really on where you lie morally and whether or not it is affecting you, your relationship with other people. 

Another good thing to explore on is if there is sexual satisfaction in the marriage,  the sex can be good, but is it fulfilling for you as a couple? if yes what part does masturbating fill? if not what else can you do as a couple to enhance your sexual expereince.A little history would give me a better perspective of the issue at hand.

Hi ,masturbation is quite normanl and in most cases quite healthy.However from what youve shared it seems that its going to be a major obstacle for your marriage .It is good that you and your husband are honest and open to each other ,communication is definatley key however sex is also vital in all releationships.I would suggest seeking help from a sex therapist before its too late.