Looks like you dwell so much on negative energies.yes I get it, life is tough sometimes but my dear, it's not always all the times. There are some good moments too.

When you focus so much in the negative side of things , your mind will absorb that and will continuously think in that direction

Accept things as they are and try hard to see the positive side of things. That will attract positive energies your way which will be very useful in developing a positive mindset. Learn to differentiate between thoughts and feelings and be aware of them. Don't fight them, find away to freely express them , which will be very liberating in the long run. Don't take yourself so serious and take ife is an experience, a journey and not the end of things.